1
00:00:02,703 --> 00:00:05,275
Your one and only source
into the scandalous lives

2
00:00:05,276 --> 00:00:08,578
of Manhattan's elite.
How's your mom doing
with the divorce and everything?

3
00:00:08,579 --> 00:00:11,281
So my dad left her for
another man. She lost 15 pounds,

4
00:00:11,282 --> 00:00:14,284
got an eye lift.
It's been good for her.
My mom kind of left us
a couple months ago.

5
00:00:14,285 --> 00:00:18,718
My dad and my sister
don't really see that.
I don't know what's happened
with my wife or my marriage,

6
00:00:18,719 --> 00:00:21,651
and you showing up here randomly
doesn't make figuring that out

7
00:00:21,652 --> 00:00:24,154
any easier.
Am I the only one who thinks
this is extremely weird?

8
00:00:24,155 --> 00:00:27,427
(Jenny) Forget about it. If dad
can let it go, so can you.
(Serena) I can't believe

9
00:00:27,428 --> 00:00:29,159
you didn't tell me
your mom came home.
Your wife despises me.

10
00:00:29,160 --> 00:00:32,132
I wouldn't say that.
Well, she did.

11
00:00:32,133 --> 00:00:35,305
You should deal with your
father. He needs you. I don't.
We broke up, okay? He was gonna
get back together with me,

12
00:00:35,306 --> 00:00:39,209
but only so my mom
would help his dad.
I need your support here,
son, and your trust.

13
00:00:39,210 --> 00:00:41,071
Well, you better hope
for your sake

14
00:00:41,072 --> 00:00:43,213
they don't call your son
to the stand.

15
00:00:43,214 --> 00:00:46,577
(Blair) Do you like me?
(Chuck) Define "like."

16
00:00:49,550 --> 00:00:52,182
And who am I?

17
00:00:52,183 --> 00:00:55,585
That's a secret I'll never tell.

18
00:00:55,586 --> 00:00:57,587
You know you love me.

19
00:00:57,588 --> 00:01:00,661
X.o.x.o., gossip girl.

20
00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:05,565
As per gossip girl's
Thanksgiving tradition,

21
00:01:05,566 --> 00:01:08,338
I'm trading my laptop
for stove top,

22
00:01:08,339 --> 00:01:10,200
and for the next 16 hours,

23
00:01:10,201 --> 00:01:12,202
the only thing I'm dishing
is seconds.

24
00:01:12,203 --> 00:01:15,345
When the cat's away,
the mice will play.

25
00:01:15,346 --> 00:01:17,177
Have fun, little rodents.

26
00:01:17,178 --> 00:01:20,810
I mean, who gets wasted
on Thanksgiving?

27
00:01:20,811 --> 00:01:22,812
The holidays
are lonely for people.

28
00:01:22,813 --> 00:01:25,355
I wanted to keep 'em company.
Whoo!

29
00:01:25,356 --> 00:01:28,388
(Bell dings)
(Nelly furtado)
♫ you're looking for a girl ♫

30
00:01:28,389 --> 00:01:31,561
Your mom is freaking out,
so my mom is freaking out.

31
00:01:31,562 --> 00:01:33,693
What, which means you freak out?

32
00:01:33,694 --> 00:01:35,825
Blair, just cut the cord.
Go nuts. Come on.

33
00:01:35,826 --> 00:01:39,629
Let's do shots. Come on!
I told Lily
that you were buying a pie.

34
00:01:39,630 --> 00:01:41,701
(Chuckles) Oh, pie.

35
00:01:41,702 --> 00:01:44,174
Where is your purse?
Uh, my purse...

36
00:01:44,175 --> 00:01:47,637
Oh, great. All right.
You stay here, okay?

37
00:01:47,638 --> 00:01:48,878
I'm gonna go look.

38
00:01:48,879 --> 00:01:50,610
Don't drink or hit on anything.

39
00:01:50,611 --> 00:01:52,242
Pie's been secured.

40
00:01:52,243 --> 00:01:56,246
Thanksgiving no longer
needs to be canceled, all right?

41
00:01:56,247 --> 00:01:57,417
Um...

42
00:01:57,418 --> 00:01:58,488
(Tires screech)

43
00:01:58,489 --> 00:02:00,190
(Horn honks)

44
00:02:00,191 --> 00:02:03,293
Hey, mom, you know,
I need to go. I'm sorry. Bye.

45
00:02:03,294 --> 00:02:05,656
(Horn honks)
Oh, man.

46
00:02:07,528 --> 00:02:10,260
(Tires screech, horn honks)
(Man) Hey! What are you doing?

47
00:02:10,261 --> 00:02:13,163
Hey, right of way, pal.

48
00:02:13,164 --> 00:02:15,735
(Man) Screw you, buddy!
Hey, uh, excu... excuse me.

49
00:02:15,736 --> 00:02:20,340
D-do you need, like,
a crossing guard or a cab maybe?

50
00:02:20,341 --> 00:02:22,542
Oh, pie.

51
00:02:22,543 --> 00:02:24,844
It's more like roadkill now,

52
00:02:24,845 --> 00:02:28,278
but, uh, better it
than you, right?

53
00:02:28,279 --> 00:02:29,779
Um...

54
00:02:29,780 --> 00:02:33,183
I'm... I'm Dan... Humphrey.
Hi.

55
00:02:33,184 --> 00:02:35,825
Hi. Uh, I don't know.
We met last year.

56
00:02:35,826 --> 00:02:38,688
Uh. You m...
You might not remember.

57
00:02:38,689 --> 00:02:40,930
Yeah, I... you probably don't,
but look,

58
00:02:40,931 --> 00:02:43,933
you should be more careful.
You need to keep
your hands off of her.

59
00:02:43,934 --> 00:02:47,297
Blair!
Trying to take advantage
of her on the holidays.

60
00:02:47,298 --> 00:02:49,569
Come on. Let's go, Serena.

61
00:02:49,570 --> 00:02:51,441
(Giggles) Bye, Dave.

62
00:02:51,442 --> 00:02:53,203
Bye.

63
00:02:53,204 --> 00:02:55,945
Bye.

64
00:02:55,946 --> 00:02:57,377
(Car door shuts)

65
00:02:57,378 --> 00:02:58,609
Bye, Serena.

66
00:03:00,781 --> 00:03:01,612
Hey.

67
00:03:01,613 --> 00:03:03,383
And hello to you.

68
00:03:03,384 --> 00:03:05,615
Big national holiday.
You excited?
Kind of am.

69
00:03:05,616 --> 00:03:07,957
Might be the first Thanksgiving
in a while

70
00:03:07,958 --> 00:03:10,320
that I actually remember.
Yeah, I bet.

71
00:03:10,321 --> 00:03:11,621
Huh?

72
00:03:11,622 --> 00:03:13,963
Nothing. Uh, you...
Uh, you at Blair's?

73
00:03:13,964 --> 00:03:16,796
Almost. Her dad's gonna be
home for the first time

74
00:03:16,797 --> 00:03:20,700
since he left,
so she's really excited.
Oh, well, family reunions
are all around then.

75
00:03:20,701 --> 00:03:22,732
Uh, we, too,
have a full Humphrey household.

76
00:03:22,733 --> 00:03:26,406
Hopefully, it'll stick.
Well, it seems like
your mom is really trying.

77
00:03:26,407 --> 00:03:28,278
Better Thanksgiving than never.

78
00:03:28,279 --> 00:03:30,280
Call me between every course?

79
00:03:30,281 --> 00:03:31,311
Okay.

80
00:03:31,312 --> 00:03:32,883
Mwah. Bye.

81
00:03:34,515 --> 00:03:37,487
Mom, is it really okay to cook
with this much heavy cream?

82
00:03:37,488 --> 00:03:41,751
Our arteries give us
a free pass on Turkey day.
It's a shame our family doesn't
have a few hundred more members.

83
00:03:41,752 --> 00:03:44,494
Do you think
I bought too much?
Only by several tons.

84
00:03:44,495 --> 00:03:46,356
But it's our first holiday back.

85
00:03:46,357 --> 00:03:49,399
I wanted to make sure
it was special.
(Rufus) Mm.

86
00:03:49,400 --> 00:03:52,402
I think they call that guilt.
Yeah, I guess they do.

87
00:03:52,403 --> 00:03:55,905
But if it means more midnight
Turkey sandwiches for all of us,

88
00:03:55,906 --> 00:03:58,908
then so be it.
Yeah, see, Dan? Uh,
we on this side of the kitchen

89
00:03:58,909 --> 00:04:01,911
choose to be positive.
Yeah, Dan.
What's it gonna be?

90
00:04:01,912 --> 00:04:03,913
(Rufus)
You with us or against us?

91
00:04:03,914 --> 00:04:06,516
Uh... (Chuckles) Fine. Fine.
But only if I can

92
00:04:06,517 --> 00:04:08,518
take the cranberry sauce
out of the can.

93
00:04:08,519 --> 00:04:10,019
That is my specialty.

94
00:04:10,020 --> 00:04:11,881
I have to find this recipe
before my dad gets here.

95
00:04:11,882 --> 00:04:13,883
Harold Waldorf's
famous pumpkin pie.

96
00:04:13,884 --> 00:04:15,925
Well, it may have
been Bobby flay's,

97
00:04:15,926 --> 00:04:18,858
but it didn't stop my dad
from taking credit for it.

98
00:04:18,859 --> 00:04:22,662
It's gonna be perfect!
Look at you.
Quite the chipper sous-chef.

99
00:04:22,663 --> 00:04:24,664
Well, I'm in a good mood.

100
00:04:24,665 --> 00:04:26,936
It happens. Sometimes
'cause I increase my Lexapro,

101
00:04:26,937 --> 00:04:29,439
sometimes
because my dad's in town.

102
00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:32,642
And sometimes, mostly because
things are good with a boy.

103
00:04:32,643 --> 00:04:35,274
You and Nate get back together?

104
00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:36,906
You mean since gossip girl

105
00:04:36,907 --> 00:04:38,948
published pictures
of him and some skank?

106
00:04:38,949 --> 00:04:41,811
So that's a no.
What's Chuck doing today?

107
00:04:41,812 --> 00:04:44,554
Why are you asking me?

108
00:04:44,555 --> 00:04:46,356
Well, you guys are friends.

109
00:04:46,357 --> 00:04:49,819
And, Blair, look, you know
you can tell me anything.

110
00:04:49,820 --> 00:04:52,592
I'd be the last person
to judge anyone.

111
00:04:52,593 --> 00:04:54,564
With good reason.

112
00:04:54,565 --> 00:04:56,697
Blair, I saw you with Chuck.

113
00:04:58,669 --> 00:05:00,970
(Sighs) I don't know
what I was thinking.

114
00:05:00,971 --> 00:05:03,973
I mean, sleeping with him once,
maybe you could understand,

115
00:05:03,974 --> 00:05:06,005
but twice?
Wait. You slept with him?

116
00:05:06,006 --> 00:05:07,977
Shh!
Ugh. Blair!

117
00:05:07,978 --> 00:05:11,310
What happened to no judging?
I'm not, but I thought
you wanted to wait.

118
00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:14,714
I thought you wanted
to make things special.
Oh, so Nate gets the free pass,
and I'm the slut?

119
00:05:14,715 --> 00:05:16,886
Tell me you didn't
sleep with Chuck for revenge.

120
00:05:16,887 --> 00:05:20,350
Well, it wasn't because
I like his natural musk,

121
00:05:20,351 --> 00:05:21,991
and besides, nothing hurts more

122
00:05:21,992 --> 00:05:24,954
than sleeping with
the best friend, right, s.?

123
00:05:24,955 --> 00:05:26,956
Way to prove a point.

124
00:05:26,957 --> 00:05:29,959
Well,
I learned from the master.
If you're sleeping
with Chuck,

125
00:05:29,960 --> 00:05:32,061
I'd say the student's
become the master.

126
00:05:32,062 --> 00:05:35,064
Are you jealous you didn't
get to sleep with him first?

127
00:05:35,065 --> 00:05:38,037
There had to be somebody left
on the Upper East Side.

128
00:05:38,038 --> 00:05:41,411
Blair, darling, are you
going to help me at all?

129
00:05:41,412 --> 00:05:44,744
Serena, do you know
when your mother's arriving?

130
00:05:44,745 --> 00:05:48,448
She's not. We're not doing
Thanksgiving here anymore.

131
00:05:48,449 --> 00:05:50,480
Oh. Why?

132
00:05:50,481 --> 00:05:53,023
Because I uninvited them.

133
00:05:58,429 --> 00:06:01,492
Happy holidays, Eleanor.

134
00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:09,399
(Serena) Mom, I know
it's my fault that we're here,

135
00:06:09,400 --> 00:06:11,801
but let's not get crazy.
Well, I don't know
what you're complaining about.

136
00:06:11,802 --> 00:06:13,803
I'm just trying
to provide my family

137
00:06:13,804 --> 00:06:16,676
with a home-cooked meal.
You don't know how to cook.

138
00:06:16,677 --> 00:06:18,648
(Laughs)
Well, don't blame me.
Talk to your sister.

139
00:06:18,649 --> 00:06:21,651
She's the one that got us
exiled from the Waldorfs.
Oh, I'm sorry.

140
00:06:21,652 --> 00:06:25,655
And even if you did cook,
we don't have an oven.
Preaching
to the converted, Eric.

141
00:06:25,656 --> 00:06:28,658
Look, we'll just pick up
a few things and try to make do.

142
00:06:28,659 --> 00:06:31,561
Like Peking duck
on Thanksgiving.
Hmm. Not a bad idea.

143
00:06:31,562 --> 00:06:34,864
No, mom.
All the other shops are closed.
There's nothing wrong

144
00:06:34,865 --> 00:06:37,166
with having Chinese food
on Thanksgiving.

145
00:06:37,167 --> 00:06:40,630
What?
Jews having been doing it
on Christmas since forever.

146
00:06:40,631 --> 00:06:43,402
Look, a pumpkin.
Isn't this...

147
00:06:43,403 --> 00:06:45,074
This is festive, yes?

148
00:06:45,075 --> 00:06:48,708
We're gonna eat a pumpkin?

149
00:06:48,709 --> 00:06:49,680
Mom.

150
00:06:49,681 --> 00:06:52,712
(Cell phone rings)
Oh.

151
00:06:52,713 --> 00:06:54,984
So you couldn't make it
past the salad, huh?

152
00:06:54,985 --> 00:06:57,687
I opened the Cranberries.
My work is done.

153
00:06:57,688 --> 00:06:58,948
How's Blair's?

154
00:06:58,949 --> 00:07:01,921
Uh, I wouldn't know.
She gave me the boot.

155
00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:05,655
Wh... she kicked you out
of her house? What happened now?

156
00:07:05,656 --> 00:07:07,697
Uh, don't ask,
but the good news is,

157
00:07:07,698 --> 00:07:09,699
my mom is gonna slice us
up a pumpkin.

158
00:07:09,700 --> 00:07:11,461
Oh, and there's duck.

159
00:07:11,462 --> 00:07:15,705
No, no, no. You can't eat duck
and raw pumpkin on Thanksgiving.

160
00:07:15,706 --> 00:07:17,567
Uh, you know what?

161
00:07:17,568 --> 00:07:20,740
I'm the guardian of Vanessa's
sister's Van for the weekend,

162
00:07:20,741 --> 00:07:22,742
and we here
at the Humphrey manor

163
00:07:22,743 --> 00:07:25,775
have an oddly large
kitchen table.
What are you suggesting?

164
00:07:25,776 --> 00:07:29,619
These smell great.
Yes, so we can starve
in a fragrant hotel room.

165
00:07:29,620 --> 00:07:32,622
We're not starving.
Look, I got us into this mess,

166
00:07:32,623 --> 00:07:34,954
so I'm gonna get us out of it.
Elaborate, Serena.

167
00:07:34,955 --> 00:07:37,126
Thanksgiving at the Humphreys.

168
00:07:37,127 --> 00:07:40,059
Dan invited me, and Eric's
friends with his sister,

169
00:07:40,060 --> 00:07:43,493
and his dad's really cool.
(Eric) Awesome.
I'm leaving the pumpkin.

170
00:07:43,494 --> 00:07:45,234
What do you say, mom?

171
00:07:45,235 --> 00:07:47,166
(Chuckles nervously)

172
00:07:47,167 --> 00:07:48,999
(Laughs)

173
00:07:51,872 --> 00:07:53,544
♫♫

174
00:07:58,549 --> 00:08:01,210
Found it.
Sous-chef, you're needed.

175
00:08:01,211 --> 00:08:03,783
Ready and awaiting orders.
I see we have extra help.

176
00:08:03,784 --> 00:08:06,986
Yes, well, Serena's spending
Thanksgiving with us this year.

177
00:08:06,987 --> 00:08:10,089
Ah, the more the merrier.
Happy to have you, my dear.

178
00:08:10,090 --> 00:08:11,791
Whoo! Yes!

179
00:08:11,792 --> 00:08:13,793
The canapés were a huge success.

180
00:08:13,794 --> 00:08:15,665
I saved one for you, Blair.

181
00:08:15,666 --> 00:08:17,627
I'm not really hungry.

182
00:08:17,628 --> 00:08:20,800
Well, what does that mean,
you're not really hungry?
Well, I had, like,

183
00:08:20,801 --> 00:08:24,604
15 of them this morning
when daddy first made them.
15?

184
00:08:24,605 --> 00:08:26,806
Serena. Serena!

185
00:08:26,807 --> 00:08:28,808
(Under breath)
Do you think that's wise?

186
00:08:28,809 --> 00:08:31,841
Darling, she's fine.
She has been for two months.

187
00:08:31,842 --> 00:08:35,545
What did the doctor say?
Don't drive us crazy, okay?

188
00:08:35,546 --> 00:08:36,286
So, please.

189
00:08:36,287 --> 00:08:38,087
Ah, fine.

190
00:08:38,088 --> 00:08:41,050
We are going to need to set
another place at the table.

191
00:08:41,051 --> 00:08:43,653
Laurel brought one of the models
I'm working with.

192
00:08:43,654 --> 00:08:46,025
Do I know her?
What's her name?

193
00:08:46,026 --> 00:08:48,057
His name is Roman.

194
00:08:48,058 --> 00:08:50,259
Ah. Roman.

195
00:08:50,260 --> 00:08:53,062
Not this one, Harold.

196
00:08:53,063 --> 00:08:55,034
We have to work together.

197
00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:56,666
(Nate) Hey, you!

198
00:08:56,667 --> 00:08:59,538
(Gasps) Happy Thanksgiving.
You, too. Good to see you.

199
00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:01,270
Mwah. Want one?
Ah, sure.

200
00:09:01,271 --> 00:09:03,913
(Eleanor) Good boy.
Nate the great.

201
00:09:03,914 --> 00:09:06,075
Mmm. So what'd I miss?
Mm, nothing.

202
00:09:06,076 --> 00:09:09,579
You're about to witness
the return of sober Serena.
Oh, Nate! (Laughs)

203
00:09:09,580 --> 00:09:12,752
(Nate) Oh, no. Oh, no.
Or maybe not. Sweetie,
would you take her upstairs?

204
00:09:12,753 --> 00:09:15,224
Put her in the bath
before your mother gets wind

205
00:09:15,225 --> 00:09:18,227
of this whole situation?
What, and leave you all alone?
Thanksgiving is our thing.

206
00:09:18,228 --> 00:09:21,030
Nate, will you please
take care of her? Please?

207
00:09:21,031 --> 00:09:22,833
Oh, I will. Come on.

208
00:09:24,094 --> 00:09:27,597
Here.
Daddy, can I help
with the pumpkin pie?

209
00:09:27,598 --> 00:09:29,068
Of course.

210
00:09:29,069 --> 00:09:30,700
Thank you.
Crush them.

211
00:09:30,701 --> 00:09:32,803
Thank you very much.
Crush them.

212
00:09:34,975 --> 00:09:37,677
Caterers?

213
00:09:37,678 --> 00:09:39,679
What's going on here?

214
00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:42,251
Everyone is getting ready
for our lovely dinner,

215
00:09:42,252 --> 00:09:43,753
and you should be, too.

216
00:09:43,754 --> 00:09:47,116
Everyone except daddy.
Where is he?

217
00:09:47,117 --> 00:09:48,888
I thought you knew.

218
00:09:48,889 --> 00:09:49,989
Knew what?

219
00:09:49,990 --> 00:09:52,992
Your father isn't coming.

220
00:09:52,993 --> 00:09:54,764
He didn't tell you?

221
00:09:54,765 --> 00:09:55,726
(Scoffs)

222
00:09:55,727 --> 00:09:58,197
He decided to stay in Paris.

223
00:09:58,198 --> 00:10:01,070
He's got either too much work,
or Roman is too much work.

224
00:10:01,071 --> 00:10:03,903
Who knows?
I-I don't understand.
If he wasn't coming,

225
00:10:03,904 --> 00:10:07,236
why wouldn't he just call me
and tell me himself?
Darling,
you should know by now

226
00:10:07,237 --> 00:10:10,079
that your father is not a fan
of the difficult conversation.

227
00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:12,912
Now why don't you run along
and change into something

228
00:10:12,913 --> 00:10:14,013
a little more...

229
00:10:14,014 --> 00:10:16,615
Enchanting?

230
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:19,750
That's good.

231
00:10:23,293 --> 00:10:26,125
Are you sure you don't want us
to stay with you?

232
00:10:26,126 --> 00:10:28,127
Yeah, we don't want
to leave you, mom,

233
00:10:28,128 --> 00:10:31,130
if you don't feel well.
Oh, no.
You kids have fun.

234
00:10:31,131 --> 00:10:34,133
I don't have
an appetite anyway.
(Knock on door)

235
00:10:34,134 --> 00:10:37,136
Oh, hold on a second.
That must be Dan.

236
00:10:37,137 --> 00:10:39,168
Hey!

237
00:10:39,169 --> 00:10:42,041
Room service.
Oh. Oh, no, no, no, no, sir.
You have the wrong room.

238
00:10:42,042 --> 00:10:44,974
Oh, no, you're early.
I lied.

239
00:10:44,975 --> 00:10:45,876
Mom.

240
00:10:45,877 --> 00:10:47,847
(Sighs)

241
00:10:47,848 --> 00:10:50,850
All I care about
is that you two are together.

242
00:10:50,851 --> 00:10:53,082
I don't want
to be an imposition.
No.

243
00:10:53,083 --> 00:10:55,925
(Knocks)
Man with Van, at your service.

244
00:10:55,926 --> 00:10:58,728
Hey.
Hey.

245
00:10:58,729 --> 00:11:01,260
Uh, bold choice of attire,
Mrs. Van Der Woodsen,

246
00:11:01,261 --> 00:11:03,833
unless it's what they're wearing
on the runway these days.

247
00:11:03,834 --> 00:11:06,836
No, my mom sicked out because
she didn't want to be imposing.

248
00:11:06,837 --> 00:11:09,298
You know what?
I am fine just curling up

249
00:11:09,299 --> 00:11:12,671
and reading a good book.
But you're supposed to be with
your family on Thanksgiving.

250
00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:15,404
Yeah, and Nicholas sparks
is hardly family.

251
00:11:15,405 --> 00:11:19,809
I'm not taking no for an answer.
In fact, I'm not even asking.

252
00:11:19,810 --> 00:11:22,681
You are coming with us.
I'm adult-napping you.

253
00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:25,114
Fine, just stop talking,

254
00:11:25,115 --> 00:11:28,087
and I'll get ready.

255
00:11:28,088 --> 00:11:30,419
Make it snappy.
I'm double-parked. Thanks.

256
00:11:30,420 --> 00:11:32,321
Hey, Rufus Humphrey.

257
00:11:32,322 --> 00:11:35,694
Leave a message,
and I'll get back to you.
(Beep)

258
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:38,027
Rufus, it's Lily.
Um, your very persistent son

259
00:11:38,028 --> 00:11:41,200
insisted
that I join you for dinner.

260
00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:44,203
I want to remind you
that my kids do not know

261
00:11:44,204 --> 00:11:47,977
that we are friendly, and I
would like to keep it that way.

262
00:11:47,978 --> 00:11:49,809
That said...

263
00:11:49,810 --> 00:11:51,982
I look forward to seeing you.

264
00:11:54,745 --> 00:11:57,216
Ugh! How could
he just blow me off?

265
00:11:57,217 --> 00:12:00,750
Thanksgiving is our ritual.
You know, he didn't even call?

266
00:12:00,751 --> 00:12:02,952
How hard is it
to pick up the phone?

267
00:12:02,953 --> 00:12:05,724
Miss Blair,
maybe you pick up phone,

268
00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:07,726
call your papa.

269
00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:11,000
Maybe he tell you
the real story.

270
00:12:11,001 --> 00:12:13,302
Real story?

271
00:12:13,303 --> 00:12:15,065
With pearls.

272
00:12:26,516 --> 00:12:28,848
Tastes good, mom.

273
00:12:28,849 --> 00:12:30,850
Thank god
citarella was still open.

274
00:12:30,851 --> 00:12:34,323
I had to improvise since we were
disinvited from the Waldorfs

275
00:12:34,324 --> 00:12:35,754
at the last minute.

276
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:38,427
(Clears throat)

277
00:12:38,428 --> 00:12:40,089
Just like I was asked

278
00:12:40,090 --> 00:12:43,833
to step down from the committee
for the snowflake ball,

279
00:12:43,834 --> 00:12:46,435
and how I wasn't asked back to
the Lincoln center foundation.

280
00:12:46,436 --> 00:12:48,838
I thought at least,
your father's lawyer

281
00:12:48,839 --> 00:12:51,871
might join us for dessert.
Mom, stop. You were all for
acting like nothing was wrong

282
00:12:51,872 --> 00:12:54,773
until it landed on you.
Nate.

283
00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:56,475
I forgot to call
the bail bondsman.

284
00:12:56,476 --> 00:12:59,478
Maybe he has nowhere to go.
Mom, no one
is more mad than I am,

285
00:12:59,479 --> 00:13:03,984
but this is not the right way.
Nathaniel, I don't need you
to fight this fight for me.

286
00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:09,919
(Utensils clatter)

287
00:13:09,920 --> 00:13:14,895
Where do you think
you're going?
Anywhere but here.

288
00:13:23,003 --> 00:13:26,005
Thank you.
What's taking Dan
and Serena so long?

289
00:13:26,006 --> 00:13:28,207
(Dan) Hey, we're here.
There you are.

290
00:13:28,208 --> 00:13:31,080
You're lucky you made it
while the Turkey's still hot.

291
00:13:31,081 --> 00:13:34,283
Mom, this is Serena,
and this is her brother Eric.
It is so nice
to meet you both.

292
00:13:34,284 --> 00:13:37,516
It's nice to meet you, too.
(Eric) Nice to meet you. Hi.

293
00:13:37,517 --> 00:13:39,819
(Dan) And this is
their mother, Lily.

294
00:13:42,222 --> 00:13:44,554
Happy Thanksgiving.

295
00:13:50,100 --> 00:13:52,231
(Ok go's "here we go again"
playing)

296
00:13:52,232 --> 00:13:54,833
Just in time, but I thought
you were gonna bring pie.

297
00:13:54,834 --> 00:13:57,106
I did, but it kinda
got run over by a taxi,

298
00:13:57,107 --> 00:14:00,569
uh, as I was trying to help
this girl stay out of traffic.
Ah, well, who needs dessert

299
00:14:00,570 --> 00:14:03,372
when we have a real-life hero
in our midst?

300
00:14:03,373 --> 00:14:06,515
Your brother
just saved a girl.
I thought you needed to be
near a girl for that to happen.

301
00:14:06,516 --> 00:14:08,978
Not just any girl. The girl.

302
00:14:08,979 --> 00:14:11,981
Oh, the blonde
you stalk at school?
Just the one.

303
00:14:11,982 --> 00:14:15,224
A thing for blondes.
You are your father's son.
Not just any blonde.

304
00:14:15,225 --> 00:14:17,957
Apparently, I like the ones
who get drunk on Thanksgiving

305
00:14:17,958 --> 00:14:20,129
and almost die.
Well, your dad liked 'em

306
00:14:20,130 --> 00:14:22,461
dangerous and troubled,
too, so...
You were dangerous?

307
00:14:22,462 --> 00:14:26,997
Who said
I was talking about me?
Well, I didn't realize
there was anyone else.

308
00:14:28,868 --> 00:14:30,940
Well, it is so nice to meet you.

309
00:14:30,941 --> 00:14:35,144
Alison. Right,
it's nice to meet you, too.

310
00:14:35,145 --> 00:14:37,006
Lily, was it?

311
00:14:37,007 --> 00:14:38,507
Yes. (Chuckles)

312
00:14:38,508 --> 00:14:42,151
Well, I'm just gonna take
these coats and put them in, um,

313
00:14:42,152 --> 00:14:46,185
Dan's room.
Uh, you know what?
It's okay. I've got them.

314
00:14:46,186 --> 00:14:47,657
(Whispers) Oh.

315
00:14:50,090 --> 00:14:51,560
Oh, thank you. Mm.

316
00:14:51,561 --> 00:14:54,293
Okay, Eric and Jenny,
napkin duty.

317
00:14:54,294 --> 00:14:56,895
Serena and Dan, I want
every water glass filled,

318
00:14:56,896 --> 00:15:01,000
and every candle
you can find lit.
I am sorry. I did not know
that you were...

319
00:15:01,001 --> 00:15:02,571
Back? Well, I am.

320
00:15:02,572 --> 00:15:05,434
And why would you know?

321
00:15:05,435 --> 00:15:09,638
Well, Dan never mentioned it
when he invited me.

322
00:15:09,639 --> 00:15:14,013
I called.
I didn't hear the phone.

323
00:15:14,014 --> 00:15:17,116
You know what?
It's fine. It's fine.

324
00:15:17,117 --> 00:15:20,449
Let's just have a great time.
This holiday's about sharing.

325
00:15:20,450 --> 00:15:24,053
Right. And if you don't mind,
um, could we not share too much?

326
00:15:24,054 --> 00:15:26,595
I haven't exactly told my kids
about my past.

327
00:15:26,596 --> 00:15:29,598
Well... our past.

328
00:15:29,599 --> 00:15:32,561
Hey, Turkey's almost room temp,
guys. Come on down.

329
00:15:32,562 --> 00:15:34,934
You grab the mashed.

330
00:15:39,169 --> 00:15:40,669
(Alison chuckles) I got that.

331
00:15:40,670 --> 00:15:43,942
(Rufus) Happy Thanksgiving.

332
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:46,075
(Eleanor)
If it's on the web site,

333
00:15:46,076 --> 00:15:48,117
then I'll go look at it.
Otherwise, I'm not gonna.

334
00:15:48,118 --> 00:15:50,179
(Laurel) Well, that goes
without speaking. We know that.

335
00:15:50,180 --> 00:15:53,482
And who's designing the page?
Well,
I wanted to talk to you.

336
00:15:53,483 --> 00:15:56,355
The guy with no hair?
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

337
00:15:56,356 --> 00:15:57,956
Blair...

338
00:15:57,957 --> 00:16:00,129
(Lowers voice)
You haven't touched your food.

339
00:16:00,130 --> 00:16:03,092
Come on, darling.
What has gotten into you?

340
00:16:03,093 --> 00:16:05,664
Well, I was going to wait
till after dinner,

341
00:16:05,665 --> 00:16:09,598
but I guess now
is as good a time as any.

342
00:16:09,599 --> 00:16:12,501
Did you call daddy and say
that I didn't want to see him

343
00:16:12,502 --> 00:16:14,103
this Thanksgiving?

344
00:16:14,104 --> 00:16:16,275
Of course not.
What a ridiculous accusation.

345
00:16:16,276 --> 00:16:19,448
So you didn't tell him that I
was so angry at him for leaving,

346
00:16:19,449 --> 00:16:22,511
that I didn't even want
to talk to him today?

347
00:16:22,512 --> 00:16:25,254
(Sighs)
You had no right
to uninvite him.

348
00:16:25,255 --> 00:16:28,217
When are you gonna get it
through your head?

349
00:16:28,218 --> 00:16:29,618
He left us.

350
00:16:29,619 --> 00:16:32,491
He didn't leave us.
He left you.

351
00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:36,065
That's enough.

352
00:16:36,066 --> 00:16:37,596
(Lowers voice)
That's enough.

353
00:16:37,597 --> 00:16:40,199
If you want
to take this up with me,

354
00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:43,502
we can discuss it later,
after our guests have left.

355
00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:46,435
Right now you either eat
or you leave the table.

356
00:16:46,436 --> 00:16:48,437
I told you, I'm not hungry.

357
00:16:48,438 --> 00:16:50,579
Or maybe dessert
will change your mind.

358
00:16:50,580 --> 00:16:54,143
Where is daddy's pie?
Hmm?

359
00:16:54,144 --> 00:16:56,585
(Man) Care for dessert, sir?
I don't see his pumpkin pie.

360
00:16:56,586 --> 00:16:58,587
Well, there were
so many delicious choices

361
00:16:58,588 --> 00:17:00,449
coming from the caterer,

362
00:17:00,450 --> 00:17:02,651
we just sent that one
down to the doorman.

363
00:17:02,652 --> 00:17:04,653
What is Thanksgiving
after all, hmm?

364
00:17:04,654 --> 00:17:10,560
Now choose one
of those amazing desserts.

365
00:17:15,135 --> 00:17:16,636
Mm-hmm.

366
00:17:39,129 --> 00:17:41,060
(Door opens and closes)

367
00:18:21,571 --> 00:18:23,372
So, uh, Mrs. Van Der Woodsen,

368
00:18:23,373 --> 00:18:26,375
um, what were thanksgivings like
when you were growing up?

369
00:18:26,376 --> 00:18:30,179
Serena said you were raised
in California?
Oh, I grew up
on a little ranch in Montecito.

370
00:18:30,180 --> 00:18:33,512
I didn't know
there were little ranches.
There aren't.

371
00:18:33,513 --> 00:18:34,613
♫♫

372
00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:38,487
(Cell phone ringing)

373
00:18:38,488 --> 00:18:42,251
I don't want to be rude,
but I should take this.
Yeah, sure.

374
00:18:42,252 --> 00:18:45,694
Hey, we're right
in the middle of di...

375
00:18:45,695 --> 00:18:48,227
Yeah. O-of course.
I'm on my way.

376
00:18:48,228 --> 00:18:49,698
What's up?

377
00:18:49,699 --> 00:18:52,861
I'm sorry,
but I have to go.
Is everything all right?

378
00:18:52,862 --> 00:18:55,304
No, but, um, it will be, I hope.

379
00:18:55,305 --> 00:18:58,307
I'm sorry. I can't really say
more, but it's nothing about us.
Okay.

380
00:18:58,308 --> 00:19:02,171
I was having a lot of fun,
though. Bye.
All right.

381
00:19:02,172 --> 00:19:05,474
(Whispers) I'm sorry, mom.
I have to go.
Oh, of course.
You're such a good friend.

382
00:19:05,475 --> 00:19:08,347
Look, um, I hope you don't mind,
but my daughter has to go.

383
00:19:08,348 --> 00:19:11,920
Do you need to go with her?
No, no, no, mom.
Stay. Have fun, please.

384
00:19:11,921 --> 00:19:14,923
Thanks, guys.
(Alison)
It was nice to meet you.

385
00:19:14,924 --> 00:19:19,628
(Clears throat)
Is she gonna be okay?
Yeah, uh, yeah. I don't think
it has anything to do with her,

386
00:19:19,629 --> 00:19:22,561
but, um, you were talking
about your ranch.

387
00:19:22,562 --> 00:19:24,563
Did you have any horses?

388
00:19:24,564 --> 00:19:27,266
Yes, I had a few.
Um, I had my own, rosewood.

389
00:19:27,267 --> 00:19:30,269
My dad has a song
called "rosewood."
Oh, but no,
not that rosewood.

390
00:19:30,270 --> 00:19:33,302
(Dan) I completely forgot
about that song.
Yeah, it's about my mom.

391
00:19:33,303 --> 00:19:36,845
You know, 'cause she had this
perfume that she always wore.

392
00:19:36,846 --> 00:19:39,478
And it was Rose and...
(Dan) Sandalwood.

393
00:19:39,479 --> 00:19:42,251
(Jenny) Sandalwood. It was
like her own personal scent.

394
00:19:42,252 --> 00:19:44,884
I'm a fool.
(Whispers)
You're not a fool.

395
00:19:50,260 --> 00:19:52,791
Um, raise your hand
if you're over 30

396
00:19:52,792 --> 00:19:55,364
and acting really weird
right now.

397
00:19:55,365 --> 00:19:56,925
I'm sorry, Alison.

398
00:19:56,926 --> 00:19:59,528
I never told Rufus
about that horse.

399
00:19:59,529 --> 00:20:03,572
So I'm sure
it's just a coincidence.
Wait a minute here.

400
00:20:03,573 --> 00:20:06,675
Why are you talking
like you know each other?

401
00:20:06,676 --> 00:20:08,908
Do you two know each other?

402
00:20:11,841 --> 00:20:15,544
Uh, we kinda did
know each other,

403
00:20:15,545 --> 00:20:17,586
a long, long time ago.
What?

404
00:20:17,587 --> 00:20:19,319
Know each other how?

405
00:20:26,896 --> 00:20:29,998
Oh, my god.

406
00:20:29,999 --> 00:20:32,601
This is unbelievable.
You know what? I need some air.

407
00:20:32,602 --> 00:20:34,834
Don't follow me.

408
00:20:39,639 --> 00:20:42,611
You have
a lot of explaining to do.

409
00:20:42,612 --> 00:20:44,713
(Dan) Mom, wait.

410
00:20:44,714 --> 00:20:47,577
May we please be excused?
Yeah, sure.

411
00:21:06,466 --> 00:21:07,836
(Nate laughs)

412
00:21:07,837 --> 00:21:09,698
Watch it. Come on.
Come on. Come on.

413
00:21:09,699 --> 00:21:11,600
I don't want a bath.

414
00:21:11,601 --> 00:21:14,773
Oh, too bad.
Blair's direct orders.
Blair's not the boss of me.

415
00:21:14,774 --> 00:21:16,775
Sit.
Oh, are you new here?

416
00:21:16,776 --> 00:21:18,777
'Cause Blair's the boss
of all of us.

417
00:21:18,778 --> 00:21:21,780
Oh, seriously, Serena, you smell
like the floor of a brewery.

418
00:21:21,781 --> 00:21:24,413
I do not.
Yes, you do.

419
00:21:24,414 --> 00:21:26,485
Oh, my god. Yes, I do.

420
00:21:26,486 --> 00:21:27,786
(Chuckles) Yeah.

421
00:21:27,787 --> 00:21:31,620
Brewery floor with a hint
of secondhand smoke?

422
00:21:31,621 --> 00:21:33,662
(Laughs) And a pint
of old spice.

423
00:21:33,663 --> 00:21:38,327
Whoa. Whoa.

424
00:21:38,328 --> 00:21:42,331
Blair's a bossy genius.
Oh, yes, she is. Mm.

425
00:21:42,332 --> 00:21:44,633
So what about you?

426
00:21:44,634 --> 00:21:47,636
What about me? I don't
smell like an ashtray.

427
00:21:47,637 --> 00:21:49,778
But you look like
an ass tray. Aah!

428
00:21:49,779 --> 00:21:51,780
Aah! Hey, Serena.
Stop, stop, stop.

429
00:21:51,781 --> 00:21:53,742
Stop, Serena.
Serena, stop.

430
00:21:53,743 --> 00:21:55,914
What's wrong with you? God.
Oh.

431
00:21:55,915 --> 00:21:58,587
Ow. God.

432
00:21:58,588 --> 00:22:00,389
Aah!
Aah! Go away!

433
00:22:00,390 --> 00:22:02,090
Oh, what, what, what, what,
what? You started it, dude.

434
00:22:02,091 --> 00:22:06,054
You started it.
You started it. Oh! What?
Stop it!

435
00:22:06,055 --> 00:22:07,496
What are you guys doing?

436
00:22:07,497 --> 00:22:11,029
(Laughs) Uh...

437
00:22:11,030 --> 00:22:13,402
Um...

438
00:22:13,403 --> 00:22:15,404
Aah!

439
00:22:15,405 --> 00:22:18,607
My hair! My... aah! Aah!

440
00:22:18,608 --> 00:22:20,439
(Screaming)

441
00:22:20,440 --> 00:22:21,840
I got you both!

442
00:22:21,841 --> 00:22:24,342
I'm king of the world.

443
00:22:24,343 --> 00:22:26,375
I'm king of the world!

444
00:22:26,376 --> 00:22:28,948
(Laughs)
(Blair screams)

445
00:22:33,352 --> 00:22:35,124
(Beeps)

446
00:22:53,002 --> 00:22:54,603
(Knock on door)

447
00:22:54,604 --> 00:22:56,876
Hey, it's me.

448
00:23:03,913 --> 00:23:05,554
(Sniffles)

449
00:23:05,555 --> 00:23:08,057
I didn't mean for it to happen.

450
00:23:13,563 --> 00:23:16,095
(Sniffles, sighs)

451
00:23:18,828 --> 00:23:21,671
I didn't see your dad
downstairs.

452
00:23:25,034 --> 00:23:28,877
My mother just decides
everything, you know?

453
00:23:28,878 --> 00:23:32,141
Everything in the world
is just totally up to her.

454
00:23:33,613 --> 00:23:35,545
I know.

455
00:23:39,148 --> 00:23:41,490
(Kisses)

456
00:23:41,491 --> 00:23:44,493
Hey, why don't
we get out of here?

457
00:23:44,494 --> 00:23:46,094
I'm not going back
to that party.

458
00:23:46,095 --> 00:23:48,156
No, I mean, outta here,
outta here.

459
00:23:48,157 --> 00:23:52,101
Out of this apartment,
to a place a little more sane.

460
00:23:54,804 --> 00:23:57,136
Any place would qualify.

461
00:24:00,910 --> 00:24:02,871
(Sniffles)
(Chuckles)

462
00:24:02,872 --> 00:24:05,644
So you actually threatened
Lily Van Der Woodsen

463
00:24:05,645 --> 00:24:07,215
with physical violence?

464
00:24:07,216 --> 00:24:09,217
Mom, you are a badass.

465
00:24:09,218 --> 00:24:11,049
Yeah, well, what can I say?

466
00:24:11,050 --> 00:24:13,922
I was younger then
and wearing steel-toed boots.

467
00:24:13,923 --> 00:24:16,955
No, no. No, we never
actually came to blows.

468
00:24:16,956 --> 00:24:21,790
I focused on transforming
my anger into art.

469
00:24:21,791 --> 00:24:23,061
I made some collages.

470
00:24:23,062 --> 00:24:25,994
I wrote a trilogy
of 1-act plays about her,

471
00:24:25,995 --> 00:24:29,167
named the character Milly,
to try to be, you know, subtle.

472
00:24:29,168 --> 00:24:30,670
It's clever.

473
00:24:32,772 --> 00:24:35,544
So what was so bad about her?

474
00:24:35,545 --> 00:24:38,507
And I mean aside from
the superior fluttering eyelids

475
00:24:38,508 --> 00:24:40,649
and punishing sarcasm.

476
00:24:40,650 --> 00:24:44,713
Well, uh, she was
your dad's first great love,

477
00:24:44,714 --> 00:24:47,956
as she liked to remind me
every chance she got.

478
00:24:47,957 --> 00:24:51,561
It's kind of hard
to compete with that.

479
00:24:54,624 --> 00:24:56,596
(Door opens)

480
00:24:58,998 --> 00:25:01,499
You've uh, been in here
for a half-hour.

481
00:25:01,500 --> 00:25:03,101
Yeah, well,
not nearly enough time

482
00:25:03,102 --> 00:25:06,234
to fathom how you allowed me
to walk into this situation.

483
00:25:06,235 --> 00:25:07,576
Allowed you? Th...

484
00:25:07,577 --> 00:25:09,237
You were the last person

485
00:25:09,238 --> 00:25:11,580
I expected to come through
my front door today.

486
00:25:11,581 --> 00:25:13,241
Yeah, well, at the very least,

487
00:25:13,242 --> 00:25:16,585
you knew that Serena would
come home and tell me all about

488
00:25:16,586 --> 00:25:19,047
the wonderful Thanksgiving
she had with Dan, his father,

489
00:25:19,048 --> 00:25:20,689
oh, and his mother.

490
00:25:20,690 --> 00:25:24,022
Is this really how you think
I deserve to find out?

491
00:25:24,023 --> 00:25:27,996
I don't know what I do
or do not owe you.

492
00:25:27,997 --> 00:25:31,129
I mean, we haven't
actually defined

493
00:25:31,130 --> 00:25:33,102
what we are to each other.

494
00:25:35,534 --> 00:25:38,907
Well, maybe this is the perfect
opportunity to do it.

495
00:25:38,908 --> 00:25:41,109
But, Lily...

496
00:25:41,110 --> 00:25:44,072
These past few weeks have...

497
00:25:44,073 --> 00:25:46,816
Have been what?

498
00:25:50,820 --> 00:25:52,851
You can't even say it, can you?

499
00:25:52,852 --> 00:25:56,055
I can, but I shouldn't.

500
00:26:00,029 --> 00:26:03,732
Look, for better, for worse,
you're one of my oldest friends.

501
00:26:03,733 --> 00:26:05,894
Mm. Oldest friends?

502
00:26:05,895 --> 00:26:07,896
That's certainly not how it felt

503
00:26:07,897 --> 00:26:10,068
when you kissed me
at Eleanor's party.

504
00:26:10,069 --> 00:26:12,171
What?

505
00:26:14,143 --> 00:26:16,274
(Groans)

506
00:26:16,275 --> 00:26:18,106
Alison, honey...

507
00:26:18,107 --> 00:26:19,978
Dan, will you go and...

508
00:26:19,979 --> 00:26:23,352
Uh, check on Jenny
and Eric. Yeah.

509
00:26:29,759 --> 00:26:31,760
(Door slams)
(Nate) Mom, where's dad?

510
00:26:31,761 --> 00:26:33,762
(Anne) How dare you do that.

511
00:26:33,763 --> 00:26:35,764
Leave in the middle
of Thanksgiving dinner?

512
00:26:35,765 --> 00:26:37,926
I need to talk to dad. Dad?

513
00:26:37,927 --> 00:26:40,829
Dad? Oh, my god. Dad. Dad.

514
00:26:40,830 --> 00:26:42,831
Mom, call 9-1-1. Hurry!

515
00:26:42,832 --> 00:26:45,074
Dad, please, wake up. Dad!

516
00:26:48,377 --> 00:26:50,008
(Serena) Dorita. (Giggles)

517
00:26:50,009 --> 00:26:53,341
(Laughs)
(Laughs) Easy.
Take a seat, honey.

518
00:26:53,342 --> 00:26:55,343
Oh, goodness.
Oh, how do I smell now?

519
00:26:55,344 --> 00:26:57,015
Uh, you smell fantastic,

520
00:26:57,016 --> 00:26:59,317
but you might not wanna
keep asking people that.

521
00:26:59,318 --> 00:27:02,320
Serena, you look wonderful.
That shirt was made for you.
Actually,
it was made for you.

522
00:27:02,321 --> 00:27:04,292
Well, I knew there
was a reason I liked it. Hmm?

523
00:27:04,293 --> 00:27:06,024
Yours, too, I see.
And mine.

524
00:27:06,025 --> 00:27:08,096
(Nate) No, no, no, no.
Oh, no, no, no.

525
00:27:08,097 --> 00:27:09,958
Would you help me
with the potatoes?
Yes.

526
00:27:09,959 --> 00:27:12,701
Ah! (Laughs)
(Nate and Serena laugh)

527
00:27:12,702 --> 00:27:16,905
Don't tell me it's a big deal.
I'm well aware of the stakes.
Hey. Who's dad talking to?

528
00:27:16,906 --> 00:27:19,768
(Captain) What now?
The office. Something about that
deal with the Dutch company.

529
00:27:19,769 --> 00:27:22,270
So it looks like I'll have
to slip out for a few minutes.

530
00:27:22,271 --> 00:27:24,242
Dad, it's a holiday.
Not in Amsterdam.

531
00:27:24,243 --> 00:27:27,746
Well, we are in America. Tell
them it will wait till tomorrow.

532
00:27:27,747 --> 00:27:31,419
Sweetheart, I don't
want to go. I have to.

533
00:27:31,420 --> 00:27:32,951
I brought this deal in,

534
00:27:32,952 --> 00:27:35,253
but if Meltzer
closes it without me,

535
00:27:35,254 --> 00:27:38,426
I don't get the commission.
Forget the commission.
I'll write you a check myself.

536
00:27:38,427 --> 00:27:40,428
Sit.
We're just about to eat.

537
00:27:40,429 --> 00:27:43,192
I think I just lost my appetite.

538
00:27:49,338 --> 00:27:51,400
(Sighs)

539
00:27:57,406 --> 00:28:00,108
Your father and his headaches.

540
00:28:00,109 --> 00:28:02,851
Probably took the Vicodin
and forgot.

541
00:28:02,852 --> 00:28:04,983
Had some whiskey,
and the next thing you know...

542
00:28:04,984 --> 00:28:07,956
Mom, seriously, did you hear
anything the doctor said?

543
00:28:07,957 --> 00:28:11,389
With what he took, he could
have cured 30 headaches.

544
00:28:11,390 --> 00:28:13,021
Mom, he's got a problem,

545
00:28:13,022 --> 00:28:15,023
and ignoring it
almost killed him.

546
00:28:15,024 --> 00:28:17,195
Oh, no.
This is not my fault.

547
00:28:17,196 --> 00:28:18,927
I'm not blaming anybody.

548
00:28:18,928 --> 00:28:21,429
You can blame whoever you want,
just not me.

549
00:28:21,430 --> 00:28:25,734
All I'm guilty of is trying
to make his life easier.
Easier? You've made
his life impossible.

550
00:28:25,735 --> 00:28:27,175
What do you mean?

551
00:28:27,176 --> 00:28:30,138
He's had everything he ever
wanted just handed to him.

552
00:28:30,139 --> 00:28:32,380
My father set him up
with his own firm.

553
00:28:32,381 --> 00:28:35,243
He gave us the house that we
live in, the Hamptons, the boat.

554
00:28:35,244 --> 00:28:38,446
He's never had to earn a dime,
and how do you think
that's working out for him,

555
00:28:38,447 --> 00:28:40,919
mom, huh? Wake up!

556
00:28:40,920 --> 00:28:43,922
All he had to do was sit
behind a desk, put on a suit

557
00:28:43,923 --> 00:28:46,825
and not get arrested, and he
couldn't manage to do that.

558
00:28:46,826 --> 00:28:49,998
You want me to give him more
responsibility in the family?

559
00:28:49,999 --> 00:28:52,961
(Sighs deeply)

560
00:28:52,962 --> 00:28:55,203
Look, I don't know
what the answer is,

561
00:28:55,204 --> 00:28:59,768
but we can't keep going on like
this, or else we'll lose him.

562
00:28:59,769 --> 00:29:02,740
Excuse me.

563
00:29:02,741 --> 00:29:05,343
Sorry to interrupt,
but Mr. Archibald is awake.

564
00:29:05,344 --> 00:29:07,275
He was asking for you.
Thank you.

565
00:29:07,276 --> 00:29:08,848
You're welcome.

566
00:29:11,420 --> 00:29:13,481
(Sniffles)
I'll go see how he's doing.

567
00:29:13,482 --> 00:29:16,485
No. I will.

568
00:29:23,863 --> 00:29:25,964
I'm not saying
you're overreacting per se,

569
00:29:25,965 --> 00:29:27,836
just having a reaction
that is above and beyond

570
00:29:27,837 --> 00:29:30,498
what is appropriate.
I have been killing myself
trying to make up

571
00:29:30,499 --> 00:29:33,842
for what happened in Hudson.
Which is not an overreaction,
I might add.

572
00:29:33,843 --> 00:29:36,474
And then I find out
that the two of you

573
00:29:36,475 --> 00:29:40,508
are making out
at theme parties?
Oh, it was hardly making out,
and there is an explanation.

574
00:29:40,509 --> 00:29:43,281
Hey, guys. I'm back,
and I... brought... Blair.
(Blair) Hey.

575
00:29:43,282 --> 00:29:46,114
Wow. Weird vibe.

576
00:29:46,115 --> 00:29:48,057
Okay. Where's Dan?

577
00:29:50,189 --> 00:29:53,191
There's no chance
we're related, right?
Oh, look at Eric's roots.

578
00:29:53,192 --> 00:29:56,364
What do you mean?
What's wrong with my roots?
They're kind of Rufus-like.

579
00:29:56,365 --> 00:29:58,366
(Serena) Hey.
Serena and Blair.

580
00:29:58,367 --> 00:30:00,368
Blair?
Yeah, it's me.

581
00:30:00,369 --> 00:30:02,530
Explanation to follow,
but first,

582
00:30:02,531 --> 00:30:06,875
what's
going on with our parents?
Oh, uh,
our dad dated your mom.

583
00:30:06,876 --> 00:30:09,277
(Dan) Yeah,
we're not related, though.
What?

584
00:30:09,278 --> 00:30:12,010
(Eric) Ignore my roots.
Wait. Wait. What?

585
00:30:12,011 --> 00:30:14,012
You know what's really weird?

586
00:30:14,013 --> 00:30:16,484
There's a garage door
in the middle of your room.

587
00:30:16,485 --> 00:30:20,218
Oh. Is that Cedric?
Wow. This day
just got a lot worse.

588
00:30:20,219 --> 00:30:23,021
Hold on. How serious
were they... our parents?

589
00:30:23,022 --> 00:30:26,024
Uh, I think it's safe to say
that they have had sex.

590
00:30:26,025 --> 00:30:29,497
Ew. Oh. No, no, no.
No, I'm gonna faint.
To repeat,
we are not related.

591
00:30:29,498 --> 00:30:33,561
She was a groupie,
and he was almost famous.
Suddenly,
my family seems so sane.

592
00:30:33,562 --> 00:30:37,966
This is too much to handle
on an empty stomach.
Well, we're not
going back out there, so...

593
00:30:37,967 --> 00:30:40,168
Well, can we leave here then,
please?

594
00:30:40,169 --> 00:30:42,941
Escape. I don't know.
Maybe eat?

595
00:30:42,942 --> 00:30:46,444
(Dan) Well, that's why
they call it a fire escape.
I think we're splitting hairs
here, Rufus.

596
00:30:46,445 --> 00:30:50,048
An emotional affair is just
as bad as a... as a physical one.
Oh, please,
nobody's buying that.

597
00:30:50,049 --> 00:30:54,322
Emotional affairs are necessary
to keep a marriage alive.
And how many times
have you been divorced?

598
00:30:54,323 --> 00:30:57,185
Alison, this is not about Lily.
This is about you and me.

599
00:30:57,186 --> 00:30:59,527
Exactly, and if we're
gonna have any chance,

600
00:30:59,528 --> 00:31:01,529
then she can't be here.

601
00:31:01,530 --> 00:31:04,592
What, for Thanksgiving?
Or ever?

602
00:31:04,593 --> 00:31:07,465
Oh, you can't be serious.

603
00:31:07,466 --> 00:31:09,067
I am.

604
00:31:09,068 --> 00:31:11,069
Look, I have made mistakes,
and I know that,

605
00:31:11,070 --> 00:31:14,342
but if she's in your life,
you're never gonna get over her.

606
00:31:14,343 --> 00:31:15,443
Alison.

607
00:31:15,444 --> 00:31:17,275
This is it, Rufus, okay?

608
00:31:17,276 --> 00:31:21,010
If you wanna make this work,
then you have to make a choice.

609
00:31:31,921 --> 00:31:35,093
She's been riding me
about my behavior.
And here she's just mad at you
for being her.

610
00:31:35,094 --> 00:31:37,565
And all this time, my dad
has been giving me this advice

611
00:31:37,566 --> 00:31:40,898
based on this girl he dated.
This girl... "A lot like Serena."

612
00:31:40,899 --> 00:31:44,332
(Jenny) It's her mom.
When you think about it,
it makes total sense

613
00:31:44,333 --> 00:31:46,935
that your mom was a groupie.
I mean, only a woman

614
00:31:46,936 --> 00:31:49,477
that had completely satisfied
her sexual appetite in her youth

615
00:31:49,478 --> 00:31:51,980
would ever marry
your stepdads.
Blair, can we not talk about
mom's appetite?

616
00:31:51,981 --> 00:31:55,083
(Dan) Yeah. Or who...
Or who satisfied it.
(Serena) It's just...

617
00:31:55,084 --> 00:31:56,644
(Dan) So...
(All) Gross.

618
00:31:56,645 --> 00:31:58,516
Yeah.
Hi.

619
00:31:58,517 --> 00:32:01,089
Hey, mom.
Is everything okay?

620
00:32:01,090 --> 00:32:03,321
Yeah. Mm-hmm.

621
00:32:03,322 --> 00:32:06,554
Do you... do you wanna go home?
We could call a car.

622
00:32:06,555 --> 00:32:08,596
Oh, no, not yet.
Um, I need fries.

623
00:32:08,597 --> 00:32:11,359
Excuse me. Could I get
some French fries?

624
00:32:11,360 --> 00:32:14,103
And just keep 'em coming.
(Woman) Sure. Coming right up.

625
00:32:16,165 --> 00:32:20,368
Uh, we should...

626
00:32:20,369 --> 00:32:23,642
I'm gonna go, too.
Leave you guys alone.

627
00:32:27,516 --> 00:32:29,077
S.

628
00:32:29,078 --> 00:32:32,720
Thank you for today.

629
00:32:32,721 --> 00:32:34,182
The sandwich was delicious.

630
00:32:34,183 --> 00:32:36,485
I'm calling Dr. Sherman
tomorrow.

631
00:32:38,557 --> 00:32:39,687
Bye.

632
00:32:39,688 --> 00:32:41,130
Bye.

633
00:32:47,136 --> 00:32:49,397
(Scoffs) Is that
really necessary, mom?

634
00:32:49,398 --> 00:32:53,671
From what I hear, you have been
in places far dirtier than this.

635
00:32:53,672 --> 00:32:56,674
Well... (Chuckles)

636
00:32:56,675 --> 00:32:59,607
Please.

637
00:32:59,608 --> 00:33:04,012
Try spending nine hours
with Jane's addiction

638
00:33:04,013 --> 00:33:05,653
on the Ohio turnpike.

639
00:33:05,654 --> 00:33:08,416
Then we'll talk about dirty.

640
00:33:08,417 --> 00:33:11,689
(Laughs) Okay.

641
00:33:11,690 --> 00:33:15,094
(Dan) See you later, Waldorf.

642
00:33:18,467 --> 00:33:21,429
So, uh, so today was not boring.

643
00:33:21,430 --> 00:33:22,700
No.

644
00:33:22,701 --> 00:33:26,274
I never should have
asked mom to come home,

645
00:33:26,275 --> 00:33:28,276
but I didn't see this coming.

646
00:33:28,277 --> 00:33:30,708
Who could've?
Don't worry about it.

647
00:33:30,709 --> 00:33:33,711
It's so weird to think that
our parents had lives before us,

648
00:33:33,712 --> 00:33:37,045
you know?
I know, or that they had lives
before each other, huh?

649
00:33:37,046 --> 00:33:38,186
Yeah.

650
00:33:38,187 --> 00:33:40,488
Lily seemed pretty upset.

651
00:33:40,489 --> 00:33:42,690
I wonder what happened
while we were gone.

652
00:33:42,691 --> 00:33:44,692
Uh, I-I don't know,

653
00:33:44,693 --> 00:33:48,556
but it looks like
we're about to find out.
Hey! Who's in the mood

654
00:33:48,557 --> 00:33:51,329
for a little
Humphrey family scrimmage?

655
00:33:51,330 --> 00:33:53,201
What'll it be?
Kids against the parents?

656
00:33:53,202 --> 00:33:56,404
Boys against the girls?
Oh, definitely
girls against the boys

657
00:33:56,405 --> 00:33:59,637
because last year, I got burned
by Dan's weak forward pass.
Hey, hey, I was nursing
a rotator cuff injury

658
00:33:59,638 --> 00:34:01,309
from aught-5.
Uh-huh.

659
00:34:01,310 --> 00:34:04,212
Aw.
Come on, mom.
Let's go work out our plays.

660
00:34:04,213 --> 00:34:06,043
(Alison) Yep.

661
00:34:06,044 --> 00:34:09,217
So, uh, dad, not that I'm...
Not that I'm mad, exactly,

662
00:34:09,218 --> 00:34:12,220
but not telling me
about Serena's mom

663
00:34:12,221 --> 00:34:14,222
was extremely uncool.

664
00:34:14,223 --> 00:34:16,684
I should've said something,
I know. And I'm sorry.

665
00:34:16,685 --> 00:34:19,487
Given the ick factor alone,
I would say that you set

666
00:34:19,488 --> 00:34:24,362
my progress back
by at least several months.
Oh, come on.
You're a Humphrey man.

667
00:34:24,363 --> 00:34:26,564
No daughter of Lily's
could ever resist.

668
00:34:26,565 --> 00:34:29,837
How'd you leave it
back there with her?

669
00:34:29,838 --> 00:34:32,069
Well, I wouldn't be expecting

670
00:34:32,070 --> 00:34:33,671
lil over for dinner
anytime soon.

671
00:34:33,672 --> 00:34:36,844
Your mom and I need to focus
on the future, not the past.

672
00:34:36,845 --> 00:34:42,111
That's a lot easier for
all of us without her around.

673
00:34:43,512 --> 00:34:45,082
Well...

674
00:34:45,083 --> 00:34:48,657
Well, let's play
with the old pigskin then.

675
00:34:58,827 --> 00:35:01,269
Mom.

676
00:35:01,270 --> 00:35:03,131
Here you are.

677
00:35:03,132 --> 00:35:06,704
And here you are.
You had me worried sick.

678
00:35:06,705 --> 00:35:08,806
Blair, uh...

679
00:35:08,807 --> 00:35:12,810
I know I-I shouldn't have lied
to you about your father.

680
00:35:12,811 --> 00:35:15,513
That never stopped you before.

681
00:35:15,514 --> 00:35:17,285
True.

682
00:35:17,286 --> 00:35:20,419
But... the real truth...

683
00:35:22,151 --> 00:35:25,193
Divorce papers from your father,

684
00:35:25,194 --> 00:35:28,456
and I'm supposed to sign them.
I haven't yet.

685
00:35:28,457 --> 00:35:31,799
Mom...

686
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:33,861
He's living in Europe...

687
00:35:33,862 --> 00:35:35,534
With a man.

688
00:35:37,436 --> 00:35:40,908
You can't be all that surprised
that he wants a divorce.

689
00:35:40,909 --> 00:35:42,570
I'm not,

690
00:35:42,571 --> 00:35:44,312
but what I...

691
00:35:44,313 --> 00:35:47,546
What I am surprised about
is how it makes me feel.

692
00:35:49,848 --> 00:35:53,222
He was my husband, after all.

693
00:35:54,523 --> 00:35:57,185
My Harold...

694
00:35:57,186 --> 00:35:59,588
For almost 20 years.

695
00:36:01,330 --> 00:36:04,462
I couldn't face him...

696
00:36:04,463 --> 00:36:06,163
During the holidays.

697
00:36:06,164 --> 00:36:08,236
It was always our happiest time.

698
00:36:08,237 --> 00:36:10,468
Why didn't you
just tell me that?

699
00:36:10,469 --> 00:36:13,341
And let you choose
between the two of us?

700
00:36:13,342 --> 00:36:15,343
I wonder
who would've won that battle.

701
00:36:15,344 --> 00:36:19,277
Yeah, I would have
been entirely alone.

702
00:36:19,278 --> 00:36:21,349
Well, uh, I was anyway.

703
00:36:21,350 --> 00:36:22,551
(Chuckles)

704
00:36:33,822 --> 00:36:35,364
(Sniffles)

705
00:36:41,700 --> 00:36:43,571
It's still Thanksgiving.

706
00:36:43,572 --> 00:36:44,672
Yeah.

707
00:36:44,673 --> 00:36:46,374
(Both chuckle)

708
00:36:46,375 --> 00:36:48,736
What do you want to do?

709
00:36:48,737 --> 00:36:51,610
(Monitor beeping)

710
00:36:58,417 --> 00:36:59,587
Hey.

711
00:36:59,588 --> 00:37:00,988
Oh, you're still here.

712
00:37:00,989 --> 00:37:03,491
I guess I must have
fallen back asleep.

713
00:37:03,492 --> 00:37:04,992
Yeah, you were, uh,

714
00:37:04,993 --> 00:37:08,396
you were pretty out of it
when I first came in.

715
00:37:08,397 --> 00:37:10,498
Where's your mom?

716
00:37:10,499 --> 00:37:13,000
She's getting coffee.

717
00:37:13,001 --> 00:37:15,663
How's your mom?

718
00:37:15,664 --> 00:37:19,337
She's gonna be all right.

719
00:37:19,338 --> 00:37:20,709
We all are.

720
00:37:23,942 --> 00:37:26,514
So...

721
00:37:26,515 --> 00:37:28,245
Vicodin and whiskey, huh?

722
00:37:28,246 --> 00:37:32,019
I guess I forgot I took that
medicine when I took that drink.

723
00:37:32,020 --> 00:37:35,252
Dad, we're not
doing this anymore.

724
00:37:35,253 --> 00:37:37,686
Okay? We're just not.

725
00:37:39,528 --> 00:37:41,559
I know it wasn't an accident.

726
00:37:41,560 --> 00:37:42,860
Of course it was.

727
00:37:42,861 --> 00:37:45,634
And when I found you,
I thought you were dead.

728
00:37:47,836 --> 00:37:50,538
I'm sorry.

729
00:37:50,539 --> 00:37:53,371
I just didn't...
I couldn't...

730
00:37:53,372 --> 00:37:57,575
Yes, you can.
Dad, you have to, please.

731
00:37:57,576 --> 00:38:00,679
I know it might not always
feel that way, but...

732
00:38:02,781 --> 00:38:04,583
We need you.

733
00:38:08,587 --> 00:38:09,988
Dad, we need you.

734
00:38:14,693 --> 00:38:17,665
(Vanessa Carlton's
"nolita fairytale" playing)

735
00:38:17,666 --> 00:38:19,697
(Blair laughs)

736
00:38:19,698 --> 00:38:23,471
Here you go, Nate.
Ah, thank you, Mr. Waldorf.
My dad will appreciate this.

737
00:38:23,472 --> 00:38:25,803
It's a pleasure.
Keep out the gravy.
He's got high cholesterol.

738
00:38:25,804 --> 00:38:28,376
Anne, it's Thanksgiving.
Mom, seriously.

739
00:38:28,377 --> 00:38:31,609
Give the man some gravy.
Happy Thanksgiving.
It's okay.
Happy Thanksgiving.

740
00:38:31,610 --> 00:38:34,542
Happy Thanksgiving.
Yeah, you, too, man.
All right.

741
00:38:34,543 --> 00:38:36,784
See you soon.

742
00:38:36,785 --> 00:38:38,386
Good night, sweetheart.

743
00:38:38,387 --> 00:38:39,647
Good night.

744
00:38:39,648 --> 00:38:42,089
(Elevator bell dings)

745
00:38:42,090 --> 00:38:43,521
Hello.
Happy Thanksgiving.

746
00:38:43,522 --> 00:38:44,822
Hey.
Hi.

747
00:38:44,823 --> 00:38:46,053
Happy Thanksgiving.
You, too.

748
00:38:46,054 --> 00:38:47,825
Hi.
Happy Thanksgiving.

749
00:38:47,826 --> 00:38:49,427
To you, as well.
Bye.

750
00:38:49,428 --> 00:38:50,728
(Nate) Bye.

751
00:38:50,729 --> 00:38:52,430
Hi.
Happy Thanksgiving, Blair.

752
00:38:52,431 --> 00:38:55,963
I am looking for my daughter.
Where is my little girl? Oh.

753
00:38:55,964 --> 00:38:59,006
Hi. Um...

754
00:38:59,007 --> 00:39:00,768
Too much Turkey?

755
00:39:00,769 --> 00:39:03,971
Uh-huh. (Laughs)

756
00:39:03,972 --> 00:39:05,973
(Vanessa Carlton) ♫ fairytale ♫

757
00:39:05,974 --> 00:39:08,776
♫ I used to ♫

758
00:39:08,777 --> 00:39:11,479
♫ hover ♫

759
00:39:11,480 --> 00:39:13,821
♫ outside my ♫

760
00:39:13,822 --> 00:39:16,754
♫ truth ♫

761
00:39:16,755 --> 00:39:18,826
♫ always ♫

762
00:39:18,827 --> 00:39:21,759
♫ worried ♫

763
00:39:21,760 --> 00:39:24,692
♫ about what I'd lose ♫

764
00:39:24,693 --> 00:39:27,635
♫ take away my record deal ♫

765
00:39:27,636 --> 00:39:29,637
♫ go on,
I don't need it ♫

766
00:39:29,638 --> 00:39:31,699
Bye, Blair.

767
00:39:31,700 --> 00:39:33,100
Happy Thanksgiving.

768
00:39:33,101 --> 00:39:35,743
(Eleanor) This time,
I went for the ginger tea.

769
00:39:35,744 --> 00:39:37,374
(Harold) Good.

770
00:39:37,375 --> 00:39:39,677
♫ I found
some kind of fairytale ♫

771
00:39:39,678 --> 00:39:43,751
Hello. Where were you?

772
00:39:43,752 --> 00:39:45,753
Exquisite. Just say it.

773
00:39:45,754 --> 00:39:48,115
Give me my shoe.

774
00:39:48,116 --> 00:39:53,160
♫ Ooh ♫

775
00:39:53,161 --> 00:39:58,165
♫ want a garden
by the ocean tide ♫

776
00:39:58,166 --> 00:40:02,630
♫ because I lose my way
searching for stage lights ♫

777
00:40:02,631 --> 00:40:05,032
♫ well, Stevie knows ♫

778
00:40:05,033 --> 00:40:07,875
♫ and I thank her so ♫

779
00:40:07,876 --> 00:40:10,508
Hey, Dan, will you pass
the mashed? It's over...

780
00:40:10,509 --> 00:40:12,079
(Rufus) Ahem.
What? Oh, yeah, here.
I'm sorry.

781
00:40:12,080 --> 00:40:15,082
Come on, son.
You're asleep at the wheel.

782
00:40:15,083 --> 00:40:18,446
The Humphrey family Thanksgiving
dinner's a well-oiled machine.
Were you still thinking
about your dream girl?

783
00:40:18,447 --> 00:40:19,817
What? No.

784
00:40:19,818 --> 00:40:21,489
(Jenny) Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

785
00:40:21,490 --> 00:40:25,022
No, no. No. I'm thinking about,
um, your stuffing, mom,

786
00:40:25,023 --> 00:40:26,754
which looks delicious.
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

787
00:40:26,755 --> 00:40:30,027
Your stuffing. Mm-hmm.
Uh-huh. Yeah.
Well, keep dreaming.

788
00:40:30,028 --> 00:40:32,930
You know, maybe one day
she'll actually know your name.

789
00:40:32,931 --> 00:40:36,534
Yeah, maybe, and then I'll have
something to be thankful for.
Oh, shut up.

790
00:40:36,535 --> 00:40:38,866
(Alison) Really.
What's that all about?

791
00:40:38,867 --> 00:40:41,108
♫ Nolita fairytale ♫

792
00:40:41,109 --> 00:40:44,071
♫ da-da, da-da, da-da ♫

793
00:40:44,072 --> 00:40:46,614
♫ da-da, da-da, da-da ♫
♫ nolita fairytale ♫

794
00:40:46,615 --> 00:40:48,646
♫ da-da, da-da, da-da ♫

795
00:40:48,647 --> 00:40:54,522
♫ da-da, da-da, da-da ♫
♫ nolita fairytale ♫

796
00:40:54,523 --> 00:40:59,527
♫ nolita fairytale ♫

797
00:40:59,528 --> 00:41:02,860
♫ nolita fairytale ♫

798
00:41:02,861 --> 00:41:05,934
♫♫